A Fresh Start and an Unplanned Mission
A few years ago, I decided that it was time to blog. That didn’t go well; I only wrote two posts. Seems that the time wasn’t quite right back then. I’m giving this another go; the time might be right this time. I’ve removed those first posts from way back and am starting fresh. Here goes.
Those of you who know me well know that my husband (Paul) and I devote a great deal of time to doing international volunteer work. We’ve been carrying out projects in Ecuador for many years. In the fall of 2022, after months of planning, we launched Misión Claridad, an ophthalmology and optometry mission to Ecuador. We took a team of eye professionals to the city of Cuenca to perform free cataract surgery and provide free eye exams and eyeglasses. In the fall of 2023, we went again, and we’re now planning a third mission for the fall of this year (2024).
In the health zone where Cuenca is located, cataract surgery is currently only performed in private clinics, at a cost of approximately $2500 USD per eye. It’s out of the reach of many individuals. So is an eye exam. So is a pair of glasses. I’ll write more about how we’re working to turn this around. We’re also working on a new project, to address another health issue in Ecuador. More about that later.
I’m personally on another mission this year—an unexpected, unplanned mission. In December of 2023, I was diagnosed with multiple myeloma. It’s a cancer of the blood, more specifically of the plasma cells (a type of white blood cell), which live in the bone marrow. Multiple myeloma is not curable, but it’s treatable. With aggressive chemotherapy followed by a stem cell transplant, I’ll hopefully go into remission for 7 to 10 years before I need more treatment. I’ll be fighting this cancer for the rest of my life, however long or short it will be. My oncology team likes to point out that multiple myeloma is not a life-threatening illness, but a life-limiting one. I know there are no guarantees, but I have hope that I’ll live to reach my eighties.
Did I have symptoms? No. A routine blood test, part of my annual physical, revealed abnormal blood counts in certain components of my blood. My GP told me that it was beyond his scope of expertise, and I’m oh so grateful that he referred me to an internal medicine specialist, who took his time explaining to me what was going on and subsequently referred me to an oncologist who specializes in hematological cancers.
So, while working on our Ecuador missions, which give me (us) such a deep sense of purpose, I’m also on a mission to get through what amounts to almost a full year of treatment. I’ve had four rounds of chemotherapy, which has been manageable and hasn’t made my hair fall out. I’ve had a central venous catheter (CVC, also called a central line) placed in my superior vena cava (the large vein that goes to my heart). The day that the CVC was surgically placed may well have been the hardest day for me physically so far. Every day has been an emotional challenge.
Through the CVC (mine has three lumens, which are the tubes that hang out of the body) I’ve had my stem cells harvested through a process called apheresis. Tomorrow I’ll be admitted to the hospital for what will be the hardest part of the treatment—the stem cell transplant. First, through my central line, which I’ve come to accept as necessary but hate nonetheless, I’ll receive high-dose chemotherapy. My oncology team says this chemotherapy drug will be a nine out of ten in terms of strength and toxicity. (Today, Paul shaved my head, since my hair was destined to fall out within the week anyway.) After the high-dose chemotherapy, I’ll receive my harvested stem cells. I’m told that I can expect to be in the hospital for 2 weeks minimum, longer if necessary. At times, I’ll be in total isolation. At other times, family and close friends can visit. (I haven’t spent the night in a hospital since I gave birth to our younger daughter, 28 years ago.) When I come out of the hospital, I’ll have to live in a virtual bubble for 3 months as my transplanted stem cells differentiate into the healthy blood cells I need, and I start to regain immunity. Then I’ll need more treatment, and then … well, I’ll save that for future posts.
Am I scared? Absolutely. Sleep, which has never been an issue for me, is now eluding me or is plagued by dreams of being in the hospital. There are risks with all of this, and while I’ve come to accept them, I’ve also come to accept that this is my only shot at living the life I want to live for several (hopefully many) more years. I do love life, and I have so much more to do before I leave.
There, I’ve put it out there. I’ve moved past the denial and the anger and the “Why me?” I’ve come to accept that I simply have to forge ahead. And really, many people in the world are faced with challenges much harder than what I’m going through.
In closing this first blog post that speaks to and about my new reality, I have this advice for you. Live life to the fullest. Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today. Be a force for good in the world; give back. And most importantly, remember that it’s the people (not the things) in your life that matter the most.
And sure, I’ll be posting more about my cancer journey, but I’ll be posting about other topics as well, because life is about more than this cancer.
About Post Author
I know it’s impossible to know or feel what you are going are through. But know that I’m here with you while you make your way through this maze of treatment.
Hallo Cynthia. We kunnen niets meer toevoegen aan hetgeen Paul al heeft verwoord… We wensen je heel veel sterkte! Liefs, Johnny en Brechtje.
Cynth, I am there with you all the way as always. Hopefully your stay in the hospital will go by fast and you’ll be home recuperating in no time. You are strong???? and the world needs you to continue with all the selfless work you do with so much love ❤️.
Keep fighting, you are doing and excellent job. Tu puedes.
♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️
Cynthia, with that strength, faith and greatness of your soul, also with Paul by your hand, you will surely get ahead this and live many more beautiful years.
We are praying for you and for your speedy recovery with all our love and admiration.
God bless you all
Hi Cynthia,
We are thinking of you. It is hard to imagine all the things you are feeling and what is going through your mind. The blog give us an idea though. Thank you for sharing.
Your positive attitude, your strength and the good energy that all your friends and family are sending to you will provide the right environment for the doctors and the treatment to be a successful story that you will share for many years to come.
I can visualize many more reunions in Radium and going with you and Paul to one of your charity trips.
Stay strong.
Clara and Juan
You are a trooper, Cynthia. I think this quality is on your side. Sending best wishes.
Thanks for sharing Cynthia and I am so sorry to hear about this diagnosis for you. You give sage advice about living life. I will be following you on this blog.
We can only pray that you get back even a little of what you have given over the years.
My sweet dear friend,
Thank you for being brave and letting us all know what you are going through. Life is not fair sometimes and I have questioned more than once “why God”! I will pray for you and your family are always in my thoughts. I pray that the surgery tomorrow is successful and that your surgeon’s hands will be guided by love and compassion. May you recover and your body is healed so that you may continue doing the charitable work that you and Paul so love. I am always here so please reach out if you need to talk. I love you so much Cynthia…take heart that there are so many others praying for you on your journey…
Love,
Karen
Kevin Flinn
Please keep me updated on your progress. I’m sure everything will unfold as you hope and this will soon be behind you.
Dear Cynthia, I’m reading this at 6 a.m. and sending huge gusts of love and hope westward. You, of all people, have always given fiercely to your family and the world, and I know you’ll be back at it as soon as you’ve recovered. Picturing you rocking the shaven-head look, with that wonderful smile of yours. I know you’ll get through this, with Paul and the girls in your close circle and the rest of your cheerleaders near and far. ❤️
Cynthia,
Thank you for sharing. Your strength through all of this is extremely inspiring. Sending all my love your way. Stay strong.
I was reading this as the sun was rising this morning. Grateful for this quiet time to reflect and connect. Cynthia and Paul – thinking of you both, sending you strength and love! My thoughts are with you on this journey. Live Sonja
Cinthya
Deeply touched by your blog. Your inner strength, faith, hope and the love of your family will carry you through these moments, and you will live many years surely with more intensity surrounded by the people who love you.
Thank you for this Cynthia I’m at such a loss, and gutted by what you have written. Know that I love you and you are truly in my thoughts and prayers.
Cynth, know that I am here for you all the way as always. Hopefully these next couple of weeks will go by fast and you’ll get out of the hospital strong ???? and ready to move on with your happy, selfless, thrilling, and exciting life.
I am so sorry for what you are going through Cynthia. I am sending a big hug and positive energy your way. If anyone has the strength to conquer this it’s you dear cousin.
We know you have the physical and mental strength to get through this.
Cynthia, you will get through this sending you strength and love! Our thoughts are with you on this journey.
Love Bonnie and Eloy
Cynthia and Paul – we are thinking of you both, sending you strength and love to get through this jounery ahead of you.
Thank you for restarting your blog Cynthia. You have been so open and honest and have painted a picture of your new mission with hope and strength.
We send you all our love and healing thoughts.
Virtual hugs. Richard and Penny????
Hi Cynthia
We are all praying for you. Keep a positive attitude and stay strong. That’s what I’ve been doing. It is not easy, but we all love you and remember that. You are not alone on this journey. Take care Cuz. Love You ❤️❤️
We are sorry that you have to go through this. Sending you healing vibes and you will win and continue living your amazing life!
Thank you for sharing Cynthia and letting us know what you are going through. You are strong and I am proud of you.
I always have you I my thoughts.
Love,
Roby
Thinking about you so much, Auntie Cynthia. Thanks for writing and sharing. Wishing you strength for the tough moments to come, and ease during the gentler moments. Sending big love from our crew down here in Calgary. xoxoxo
Hi Cynthia,
Thank you for sharing about what you’re going through and for your ever-elegant, free flowing and compelling writing style, complete with diagrams :)
I hope your sleep improves. Maybe meditation could help?
I’ll keep sending love and good thoughts to you and the whole family.
Love and hugs,
Nicholas, Angela and the girls
Hi Cynthia,
Thank you for sharing your journey with us. I hope you can feel the love and positive thoughts being sent your way. I will be holding you in my heart and will be anticipating more blog posts from you. Love to Paul and the girls too. Xo
My dear friend Cynthia. I wish only the best for you. My sister also did a stem cell transplant. She found that a vision board helped her a lot during her hospitalization. I cannot imagine how scary this journey is for you, but you are always so positive and resilient and I believe that will help you to heal quickly . I have no doubt that you will come through this journey on the positive side. Sending you positive energy and tons of love.
Dear Cynthia, you are a brave and an exceprional person. I salute you. Surviving 3 wars , one in Vietnam and 2 in Israel, I can recognize a fighter, a giant, a star….that’s you, Cynthia. Again , I salute you. You will overcome all problems and be with us for many, many years. And you will visit Jerusalem again and meet the Mighty and my prayers for your wellbeing. Peace on you and wish you strenght and fast full recovery.
Dr.Yitzhak Kamhi
Neil Bricker
Hi Cynthia and Paul,
Thank you for including me in this journey. Thank you for your honesty.
You’ve both been prominently on my mind ever since you visited me
and revealed the diagnosis. I wish you the very best through this next part
of the journey. If sleep continues to be elusive,
maybe try some “Just for Laughs – Gags” to fall asleep laughing;
it’s worked for me. Sending love and laughter.
Dear Cynthia
Thank you for sharing with us your amazing blog and the difficult journey you are going through. We are wishing you strength for what lies ahead and sending our love and prayers.
David, Rosemary, Mike, Jennifer and family. ❤️❤️
You are a strong woman… We admire you for how you see things always in the most positive way!…
We are definitely going to see you and Paul next year!… We have a pending gathering in Canada…
We all send you a big hug and the best of our energy!!
Att: Juan, Alex, Sebas y Leo
Cynthia, thanks for sharing your journey. You are an absolutely amazing person and friend. My heart aches for you – I know that you will get through this. One step at a time. Sending healing prayers, many hugs, and lots of love. Love Lynne
Dear Cynthia. We are lifting both you and Paul up in prayer for the journey ahead. This is scary but put your trust in God and He will see you through.
Hi, Cynthia! I’ve juste read this first blog post of yours. I’m praying and wishing all the best for you. A good recovery. Im not good with words. Anyway, I want to read more and good evoluations of you against this cancer.
Thank you for sharing your journey with us Cynthia. Your quest for ‘life’ will win your battle
with cancer. You have the hopes and prayers of so many people working with you. As you
proceed forward you can rest assured knowing our spiritual support is constantly with you.
We love you and need you in our world.
I am sorry it took me two days to comment. Thank you for letting me know, and I am sure today will go well as “you have so much more to do”. However, I do wish the two of yo did not have to deal with this.
Oh my my Cynthia what a challenge you are facing. Your optimism and determination to work through this are commendable. You have had such an impact on many many people through your teachings and your Rotary commitments and great projects in Ecuador; I’m sure that that will continue. It sounds like you have a great medical team ensuring you will win this battle. I send healing thoughts and prayers. Hugs hugs hugs
Manon:)
Prayers that all is going well. Take care. I know it will get better
Cynthia, dear, Cynthia, Thanks so much for sharing your story with us–not just your “unplanned mission,” but all of your stories, adventures, and experiences that we will be reading about. I will take your advice to heart and focus my energy on the many many beautiful things that matter in this world. You are, as always, inspiring. xoxoxo
Thanks so much for being so frank about what you’re going through, Cynthia. You’ve been on my heart since we shared an evening together and you broke the hard news. It’s obvious you have the strength of spirit to make it through, but it must be oh to frustrating and long. Strength to you, Paul and the entire family!
Dearest, Cynthia, thank you so much for having the courage to write this. You have always been so strong and so focused.
I am inspired by your willingness to share your journey— not just with your inner circle, but with the world.
I share your mantra of living every day like it could be your last. I, too, live by that mantra and it has given me strength and the courage to face life’s challenges.
I have no doubt you will forge your way through this challenge and inspire many others as you overcome the hurdles one at a time.
Love to you and Paul and see you in late September. ❤️
My precious cousin, Cynthia! I am truly at a loss for words and can’t even begin to understand all you are going through! As you face the uncertainty of treatments, appointments and the unknown, please remember to lean on your support system. You have an army of family, friends and so many more loved ones rallying and cheering you on to celebrate victories and uplift you through setbacks. We stand beside you ready to support you in any way we can. You are in my deepest thoughts and prayers every day as you battle against such a terrible disease. Your strength, resilience and determination to fight, to never give up, and to stay positive are an inspirations to the incredible person you are. Never lose hope! Stay strong in the toughest of times! You’re in my heart each and everyday and love you dearly!
I have nothing deep to say. Sending love and light and thinking of you often. keep the pen handy for your thoughts. I cannot tell you how many books from cancer survivors that I devoured and still read 21 years after my diagnosis. There will be people who find solace and strength in the power of your journey and how you face it down to live on.
Dear Cynthia
Our thoughts and prayers are with you daily.
Sincerely,
Julie and Paul
You are an amazing woman. I admire all that you do for others and now others are stepping up to support you. I have thought of you every day since you shared your diagnosis. I have no words that can comfort you but I hope that you know how many people admire and love you. We can’t wait until you’re on the other side of the treatments and ready to resume you life again; the volunteer work, art, writing, and healthy lifestyle you have always embraced. Looking forward to reading more updates as you gain strength. Sending you Love and Light. XO